Loving Yourself More: Being a young black man, I know plenty of beautiful black women who are very confident in their appearance. At the same time, many tend to be just a bit self-conscious. To me, this is very puzzling. Why would a beautiful dark skin black woman with flawless skin and a gorgeous smile feel that she is not seen by women with lighter skin tones? Why does a woman who is a size 12, not overweight, but just kind of thick (in the right places), feel like she needs to lose weight and tone down her curves? Why is interracial dating such a sensitive topic for black women when it concerns black men going to different races?

I hear it all the time. A woman with a dark complexion complaining about men of her race only goes for women with light skin and straight hair. Then you have the beautiful big women saying that men only want skinny women. At the same time, the slim figured women complain that the media causes men only to like women with waistlines but unrealistic measurements regarding their breasts and rear-ends. You also have black women saying that black men all want white women, and white women who date black men say that black men are afraid to approach them because of what black women think. While these assumptions might be valid in some cases, I can’t help but think it is slightly absurd. Most people blame the media for making women have this mindset and making a specific type of woman seem famous and more beautiful, not because she looks better, but simply because she looks a certain way.

Women should ignore what the media say is beautiful but focus more on the features that make them beautiful and unique. For example, if you are a dark woman, you shouldn’t feel like you are missing out because light skin is in, but instead realize that even though you might not have naturally curly or straight hair, bright colored eyes, and fair complexion, you might still have those gorgeous eyes that just glimmer in the light, clear, beautiful skin that is soft and smooth and that flawless smile that lights up the room! So ladies, “love yourself because we sure do love you.” Know just how beautiful you are, and don’t focus on what the media says is beautiful but what you think is gorgeous.

10 Things: Ladies, please stop the madness. We need many of you to take back your pride and not sell it off for that “good D,” some attention, or because you’re afraid of being alone. You’re placing these men out here on pedals because they are good-looking and have that charisma, swag, a little style, and yes, I’m repeating it, “good D.” Stop excusing their inability to keep a job by taking care of them. Where is your dignity? The fear of being alone should be the prerequisite for giving up your pride. And let’s not speak on the foul odors many of these guys carry because they are scared of water and wipe their bottoms like a little four-year-old. But I’m done ranting. Just do better, ladies.

Below are 10 Things that should make any man – good-looking or not unattractive and unworthy of a good woman.

Unemployment

So it seems like unemployment was the biggest no-no that would make a good-looking man unattractive. But I ask, is the unemployment due to the down-turned economy, or is he just a loser looking to be supported by anyone who adores his special features? From our survey, women really have a particular interest in this question and they despise a broke ass man! Man, travel to another city, become a personal trainer/escort, sell snacks on the train, but please get a job if you want a fine woman or man?

Bad Hygiene

Both women and gay men had a big issue with a good-looking man having bad hygiene. Honestly, if you’re a good looking anybody, you’re halfway there. Why would you mess up all that goodness by being smelly? Some people may like a little musk, but cheesy you know what’s aren’t tasty at all. I’m a man… I know! And I wouldn’t even consider not washing mines before sex!

Lack of Style

This is an issue gay and straight men chimed in on. I guess they were all good looking. All jokes aside though; a stylish man is appealing and an ordinary one would look even more appealing. So gents, whatever you gotta do to get your game up… do it! Follow us on Pinterest and get some style tips. You can even go to Lenox Mall and scout the mannequins in Bloomies, Versace, Neimans, and Kenneth Cole. And for those who are thrifty, H&M. Oh, and stylish doesn’t mean having your goodies all out for the whole world to see. I know some of you use that to advertise, but that is what Facebook, craigslist, Instagram and twitter are for; finding anonymous hookups. Yeah, I’m talking to all y’all; heads up ladies, girlfriends, and wives!

Being Self-Absorbed

Okay, it seems like many people had an issue with good-looking guys using their looks as head-bangers. Nothing detracts from a good looking man than thinking it’s all about him. Personally, give me an ordinary woman or man with great taste, style, smile, conversation, who knows how to throw down in the bedroom and kitchen.

Lack of Confidence

Women seem to detest a good-looking man who doesn’t have confidence. I can understand that though. Most women in general, look to their men for comfort and protection. They look for a man that can be their superman in public and in the bedroom. After all, who really want to be with someone who isn’t sure of whom he or she is?

Being out of shape

Okay, the gay men have this on lock. They want a good-looking man that is fit and healthy. You know what I say about that… get your game up before you want to find that Adonis. It seems like most people in general always want a dime when they are only a 5. And the big woman wants a skinny man. I really don’t get that but to each his/her own!

Nasty Attitude

Both women and gay men chimed in on this one as well. They said they hate good-looking guys who have nasty attitudes. I must concur! A good-looking man would seem very ugly if he has a nasty attitude. So to all the good looking guys out there, if you have a bad attitude because you know you look good and everybody wants you, not! This makes you uglier than the most unattractive person on earth. Matter-of-fact, you would be the ugliest person on earth!

Bad Teeth

This is really huge for gay men. They said no bad teeth here. Honestly, everybody should say no to bad teeth. At some point in your life, you should be able to afford to go to the dentist. It’s no excuse that your teeth are bad and you try to make up for it because you’re really good looking. Man, get a grip, and get your mug fixed!

Being a Cheapskate

Women and gay men chimed in on this once again.  I guess nothing is uglier than a good-looking man that’s a cheapskate. I must say I’m allergic to cheap people. I consider myself a very thoughtful person who gives really nice gifts. So, if I give you an expensive gift, dammit, I want one as well. You know what I hate even worst is someone who always wants gifts but doesn’t even think to give you one in return. I guess there’s a name for that – gold-digging cheapskate!

Keep an Untidy Home

Rounding off the top 10 list is an “untidy man.” Everyone chimed in on this one. They said hell no to the dirty good-looking man! This seems to be a common thing for men in general. You have a lot of guys out there who love looking good but are messy as hell. They don’t keep their pads clean at all. Their cars are cleaner than where they live. And women, shame on you! How can you date a guy, go to his house and see that mess and still sleep with him? I had a roommate years back; good looking guy, who had the same personality. This guy had women left and right and even had a steady girlfriend he tried to move in on us. He always smelled good, face groomed, and looked pristine until you enter his room.  We’re talking about dust packed on his TV and electronics, dresser, and everywhere else you could imagine. He was also allergic to vacuuming too. So if you have a dime that is untidy, drop to an 8 and get you a cleaner man!

Commentary By Wilford G.

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Marriage and Bisexuality: In the realm of relationships and human connections, there is a beautiful diversity that exists within the spectrum of sexual orientation. As societal attitudes evolve, it is crucial that we address and challenge the misconceptions surrounding bisexuality, particularly within the context of marriages. Embracing bisexuality in marriages not only fosters authenticity but also promotes love, acceptance, and the deepening of emotional connections.

Bisexuality, the capacity to feel romantic and/or sexual attraction to people of more than one gender, is a valid and genuine orientation. Unfortunately, misconceptions and prejudices often lead to a lack of understanding and acceptance. Many people wrongly assume that bisexuality threatens the foundation of a marriage or signifies a lack of commitment. However, embracing bisexuality in marriages can instead strengthen the bond between partners and create a space of trust, open communication, and acceptance.

Firstly, embracing bisexuality in marriages allows individuals to express their authentic selves. Honesty and self-discovery are vital components of personal growth and fulfillment. By acknowledging and accepting one’s bisexuality within a marriage, individuals are given the opportunity to explore and express their true desires, ensuring that they are not suppressing an integral part of their identity. This level of self-awareness and acceptance is fundamental for personal happiness and the well-being of the marital relationship.

Secondly, embracing bisexuality in marriages allows for open and honest communication between partners. When one spouse identifies as bisexual, it presents an opportunity for deepening the emotional connection through conversations about desires, boundaries, and mutual understanding. Engaging in such discussions can foster a heightened level of trust, leading to a more intimate and fulfilling relationship. By embracing bisexuality, couples can explore the unique challenges and joys that may arise, creating a safe and supportive environment for both partners.

Moreover, embracing bisexuality in marriages challenges societal norms and promotes inclusivity. By openly acknowledging bisexuality within the confines of a committed relationship, couples can challenge the monosexist notions that assume individuals are only capable of being attracted to one gender. This, in turn, helps to break down harmful stereotypes and fosters a more accepting and inclusive society.

However, it is crucial to note that embracing bisexuality in marriages requires open-mindedness, empathy, and active consent from both partners. Honest and ongoing communication about desires, boundaries, and expectations is vital to ensure the well-being and happiness of everyone involved. It is essential to approach these discussions with respect, understanding, and a commitment to support each other’s growth and fulfillment.

In conclusion, embracing bisexuality in marriages is a path towards authenticity, love, and acceptance. By challenging misconceptions and promoting open-mindedness, we create a society that celebrates the beauty and diversity of human sexuality. When couples acknowledge and embrace bisexuality within their marriage, they foster personal growth, strengthen emotional bonds, and challenge societal norms. Let us embrace the full spectrum of human experiences, fostering love and acceptance in our marriages and beyond.

 Read more articles form the Percy Says! Column.

Recently rapper Rick Ross said that he hopes that his fellow Maybach Music Group rappers can learn from his recent controversy. The controversy surrounding Rick Ross comes from his lyrics from the song U.O.E.N.O., which led to women’s rights groups protesting him as well as demanding that Reebok cut ties with him. In case you haven’t heard his verse (since it was replaced after the controversy) the line that caused so much backlash was “Put a molly in her champagne, she ain’t even know it. Took her home and enjoyed that, she ain’t even know it.” Without a doubt, using date rape as a punchline in a song is idiotic and reckless at best, especially when you are a successful rapper in the public’s eye with an endorsement deal. However, he claims to have learned his lesson and was quoted saying that it was a learning experience he hopes his fellow MMG colleagues would take from.

Rick Ross isn’t the only rapper who have lost an endorsement deal because of reckless lyrics. Lil Wayne also lost an endorsement deal with Mountain Dew because of his controversial (and kind of lame) Emmett Till punchline that he used in Future’s Karate Chop remix.

Both Lil Wayne and Rick Ross issued apologies for their lyrics, and Ricky even said that he hopes that rappers learn from his mistake. However, you have to ask yourself if the apologies were actually genuine and if rappers will actually learn to stay away from controversy for the sake of their careers? There have been so many controversial lyrics and actions done by artists throughout the years that gained negative media attention. T.I. was arrested on gun charges. Eminem, Tyler the Creator, and many other rappers have been under fire in the past for using homophobic slurs in their lyrics. Chris Brown beat up his former girlfriend, Rihanna, gone on twitter rants against bloggers and gotten into brawls with other artists; one of which caused innocent people to get injured. The list goes on and on for Chris Brown, so hopefully, you get the point. What do all rappers who have been in these situations have in common? Even if their actions lead them to lose endorsements at the moment, the artists managed to last long enough for the situations to blow over without doing permanent damage to their careers.

Many people, especially the execs at the companies who give rappers endorsement deals, hope that artists will learn to stay away from controversy and not do things that would harm their image. But let’s be honest for a second. When was the last time you heard about a popular rapper who is talented actually losing a record deal or having his/her career ended for saying or doing something controversial? Yes, there have been rappers who have had their music careers ended because of long jail sentences or situations that caused them to lose street cred, but how many have actually lost their careers due to offending people with their lyrics? So what is the real lesson that is learned? Would  the lesson be something along the lines of “Make sure you invest in a good PR rep for situations like this?” Or would “Just apologize and come out with a really hot track” work better? “It will all blow over soon” is the actual lesson that rappers will learn from similar situations of other artists? Maybe whoever said “there is no such thing as bad publicity” was onto something.

From the Editor’s: “As we continue the relaunch of USLMAG.COM, some of it’s most prominent articles have been reposted in an effect to convey our rebranding efforts. Please keep informed with us online and on social media as we mix-it-up and jump out of the box a bit.” -Editor’s Choice